Why Pray

Why pray? -Because I want a relationship with God, just as God wants to have one with me.  Praying (talking) is just one aspect of developing a bond.  One of the ways I move from being an acquaintance to being a friend is telling God how my life is going.  I sometimes cry in anguish with

God. Other times I laughingly tell God of the wonderful things happening in my life. Although God knows all of these things, by sharing God and I are forming a connection that can survive through difficult times.

Why pray? -Because if I do not honestly speak to God, how can I be honest with myself? At my most hurt, I raged at God.  This candid reaction to pain allowed me to learn that painful experiences are not the fault of God.  AND God shares in my pain just as my earthly parents do.

Why pray? -Because I need to hear what God has to say to me.  Prayer is more than talking to God.  It also involves listening to what God want me to know and understand.  When I sit quietly and open my mind, God shares just as I have with God.

Hope

How do you find hope today?  What if every where you look for hope, all you see are obstacles?  How do others deal with oppression on a daily basis?  Hope is a often a difficult feeling to find, especially in our economically unstable world. 

As I begin my field education at Hope Community of Shalom, I am meeting people who are seeking the basic things in survival.  Hope to them means that they have food for the weekend and clothes that aren't ripped or too small.  It also means that their kids have a place to go where they aren't sitting in front of the TV or getting into trouble on the streets.  Hope means that grandparents have a place to meet with others who are raising grandchildren.  Hope means discovering that God loves people even when they feel like they are unloveable.

What has impressed me about Hope Community is the fact that it was created based on the desires and needs of the neighborhood in which it was founded.  People walk to the building to get groceries, eat a meal, shop for clothes, and worship God.

This past Sunday afternoon I worked in the food pantry, which is aptly named "Loaves and Fishes."  I worked with two men who are also patrons of Hope.  They came to receive services and decided to also give their time.  Others went to Fiesta Domingo, the Sunday evening meal, and helped clean up.  Some people come to Hope and receive goods and services without helping AND that is okay too! 

Hope can be given and can be received.  Hope can be witnessed and can be experienced.  Look for the Hope that is in our world and share it. 

Will the Rains Come?

After 10 months of no significant rainfall, Lubbock got a downpour last night. I was at the executive session of MCC Lubbock's Board of Directors meeting while it was going on. As we tried to conduct our meeting, we would often become distracted by the sounds of massive amounts of water hitting the doors, windows, and roof. Cracks of lightening brought shared grins.

Our spiritual lives can often be mirrored by the weather. At times I have felt dry and dusty like the drought that still affects Texas. I question if God is present and wonder why I'm not feeling that contact. When a dark, little cloud comes over my spiritual horizon, I remember that God is present in all things and that I am the one who moves away from God. I am reminded that "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens..." (Ecc 3:1)

Then like last night, everywhere I turn I see evidence that God is working in my life. Sometimes I feel so refreshed by the impact of God that I want to run out in the streets dancing for joy, just as many of us wanted to go out in the rain. As God makes wonderful and exciting things happen in my life, I cannot hold back the grin.

I am called by God to remain faithful, to wait for the blessings that God will rain upon me. While I wait, I must continue to do God's will even when the sun feels too hot and the winds scour my skin. AND I must remember that God stands with me through it all.

Virtual Church

Walking around Sunshine Cathedral Second Life, I felt as though I was touring a physical world church. I like the idea that I can click on a study guide and get information about a book or Bible study that will be held there. I also like that I can click on a large video screen and watch a pastor's sermon from a physical church.

The question that springs to mind is: how is this virtual church different from a church's web page? The answer comes when the church service begins. Unlike on a web page, I actually heard the short sermon presented as it was going out to the rest of the attending avatars.

As I participated in the service, I was aware that others shared this encounter with me. The service was a different experience from when I toured the church on my own. I could follow the examples of the more experienced avatars and could add amen or other responses when I desired to do so. I could have also sat and never typed/uttered a word. After the service, some of the more regular attendees spoke to me. Again I was aware that I was not alone during this time.

As Douglas Estes said in SimChurch, some people who have social anxieties find a virtual church to be a safer place to socialize and develop relationships. I can certainly see the advantage when "virtual-world interactions can be far more authentic and far less awkward than real-world relationships...." (27) In addition to those with social anxieties, those people, who are not familiar with mainstream churches, "will prefer to worship in the virtual world because of the flexibility, transparency, diversity, and other innate strengths found in most virtual churches." (28)

The experience of virtual church felt like more than if I'd been on a web page. I felt like I had been somewhere. As someone who doesn't routinely function in the virtual world, I have to say I'm not sure where I've been. If someone who is comfortable moving about Second Life, I can certainly see the appeal of attending church with others who have similar interests.

Virtual Community?

As I examine virtual worlds and avatars, I wonder if I can develop community/relationships while I am the only person in the room. This idea seems crazy when I consider how I developed the current relationships I have at MCC Lubbock. I interact in person to my friends while at church. I "pass the peace" by shaking hands and/or hugging others. Our skin touches.

In the virtual world my avatar can touch others and speak to others, but is it the same? This far-out idea (far out to this 40-something) feels foreign and unwieldy. I'm already awkward in person. In the virtual world, I'm not even sure if that person is talking to me. I don't know how to walk up and have a conversation in this world any better than I do in the physical world.

A few days before the church service at Sunshine Cathedral Second Life, I scoped it out. I tried to walk and ended up on top of a pew and later a table. I don't know how I got up there and wasn't sure how to get off of them. At that point I consoled myself that at least I was in the church on the island where I had planned to be. Earlier I had fallen into the water and took nearly 20 minutes trying to figure out how to get back on dry land.

I found myself saying "Why would anyone want to do this?" As I heard these words in my head, I thought of my dad complaining about Facebook, "Why would you tell people what you are doing and where you are doing it? That's how burglars figure out where to strike next."

...Okay, so maybe I can give this virtual thing another try. After all I have created a community on Facebook where some of my friends are across the country, some are down the street, and most I haven't seen in over a year. If I can be in community in this form, I suppose I could try to it with computer people who have wings or look like cats.

After all I am in relationship with God who is not often present in fleshly form.

Communion

The lights in the sanctuary dimmed in preparation of Communion. The pastor asked everyone to go to God in prayer. I sat silently thinking to myself, “Can I go to Communion? Is it sacrilegious to participate when I didn’t really believe? I need to feel another person’s touch. What am I supposed to do?”

I struggled with my thoughts as the head usher stepped beside my row. The usher had moved on to the next row before I could make my body move. As I stepped into the aisle, I felt like every person knew that I was a skeptic. I gasped for shallow breaths expecting at any moment that someone would tell me to sit down.

When my turn finally came, I went to the first server available. The woman gave me the elements, softly saying, “Receive the body and blood of Jesus.” Then she laid her hand on my shoulder and whispered a quiet blessing. Her gentle touch seemed to tell me that she welcomed me into fellowship with her.

That first Sunday I accepted communion (definitely with a small “c”) with the people of MCC Lubbock. As defined by the dictionary communion can be an “interchange or sharing of thoughts or emotions” and “the act of sharing, or holding in common.” Because I was able to step forward and begin a deeper relationship on that Sunday, I was later able to accept Communion with and from God. I had to learn that others were accessible to me before I could grasp God’s presence in my life.

Sharing the Faith

My class project on evangelism had not gone the way I expected. In fact it would be more accurate to say that I really didn't feel have a project. AND I was flying to Boston for my class where I was expected to have a project. At the airport I said a small prayer to God. I asked that I be given an opportunity to talk about faith with someone along my journey.

On the final leg of my flight, I turned off my Kindle when the flight attendant announced that all electronic devices had to be put away. The man next to me said, “So... how do you like your Kindle?” For a few minutes we talked about the merits of electronic readers as opposed to the traditional paper book. Our conversation continued from there.

Back and forth we asked questions of each other and expressed our experiences with work, life and eventually faith. Although my seatmate didn't categorize himself as Christian, he was concerned that his friends who were Christians didn't seem to do anything with their faith. He talked about how he was disappointed that they didn't feel the need to do any more than sit in a pew on Sunday. As we talked, I heard how he thought believing would bring more changes in their lives. Ultimately the man wondered what good was God if a person wasn't changed by the relationship.

Taking the opening he gave me, I described how lonely and isolated I had felt before I began cultivating my relationship with God. I shared my relief in knowing that I was not alone and that God understood everything that I felt. Although the man did not suddenly embrace God and Christ, we had a conversation that was an opportunity for both of us to share our stories.

At the end of the flight, I knew that I not only had a project, but also rejuvenated faith that God answers prayers. I learned that part of sharing faith is not trying to force the issue, like trying to make a project happen. But rather it is about having conversations with individuals.